2025-02-27

It has grown a lot quieter recently. The bangs on the wall have ceased. The grinder that used to also sear my ears with its sharp cutting sound: metal to metal, has also stopped for a few days now and I am only beginning to realize. I'll have a short moment of lucidity during the day whenever I go down to the kitchen and get a glass of water, where suddenly, everything felt safe again. My mind doesn't need to exert extra effort to ignore the noises. I don't have to convince myself that eventually, my mind will tune the noises out. Peace slowly settles in as I hope that this would be one of our well-deserved breaks from all the noise.

These unwanted and intrusive noises has been part of my first week's demise. It did feel like my mind worked the extra mile lately just to keep myself barely running, at least to maintain the order inside the house: all the chores that need to be done and in taking care of Bobbi. Lately, I feel more present at work. Consultations with my manager has been going great and my progress with my current project has been going smoothly with its end in sight.

I feel like I'm starting to bounce back from all the suspended feelings I have had throughout this month. I may have been brewing some insights about how I lived my present life through all these unknown uncertainties. I am glad to have started this practice for this year. I do know that things slowed down. But I am slowly picking up where I left off and perhaps get some things moving around before this quarter ends.