What It Means to be Human

Often fragile but yearns for stability. I always thought of myself as someone who is still trying to decode the meaning of humanity, its purpose and the justification of its collective existence.

This exploration isn't unchartered. A lot of philosophers have already attempted to give meaning to this (which are ideas that I really haven't fully given enough time to read--nor will I also do in the near future) and I do not aim to add something to the discourse. It is as if I am also trying to just get a grasp of this idea for my own peace of mind.

Going through therapy marked a paradigm shift on my mind. I used to believe that I cannot trust other people--that the only one who I can make a pact with, which is a promise that can binds me to death, is my self. There is still a molecule of this idea that I find undeniably true but its intensity in terms of my guiding principles in life has ben reduced only to the fraction of my being. What I mean to say is that I have given up on the idea that I can survive in this world alone without the help of other people.

How we become, is entirely dependent on how we see ourselves and how we perceive the influence of other people to us. This is why I think the very concept of humanity eludes me. The very idea that I am attempting to define it strictly in terms of my own understanding feels unfair too self-righteous, as it feels that I am imposing a definition that involves individual lives that I have no idea about. Am I after clarity of understanding or do I just want to end this seemingly endless wondering? There is too much that my brain is trying to grasp at the same time in attempting even just to have an entry point to a definition for humanity.

What comes to mind is always the most obvious route of differentiating humans from animals. Answering to our knee-jerk reactions will always result to a chaotic turn of consequences. There will always be a need for us, in acting human, to stop and look at one's as an individual and start defining what kind of a person we want to be. What role are we willing to play as another person in the life of others? The act of embracing a certain responsibility to once's actions and taking full control over their own decisions.

There are no instructions on how to live a life. We are never taught of the different things on how we can go about living in this world. If we are thrown into this world without an ounce of idea why, then should it be one of our main tasks to inquire about our own nature and define it? At the same time, all questions that we have about life and how to live a good one has been answered by philosophers who have assumed the responsibility of uncovering some of the satisfying answers. While some have strived to actually give our own meaning to it, some have tragically found themselves finding the meaning in ending theirs. Which tells us that there is actually no strong answer in how we can struggle our way through this meaninglessness.

Still, those philosophers have only been doing the legwork of what makes us human: in a tiring attempt to make sense of the world, it has become our own gift and curse to define the very nature of what governs us and what constitutes us as a species. The answer that I have found for me is that the value of trying to understand ourselves is the beautiful key that opens the door to the true nature of the universe. This curiosity, this unabashed attempts to dive into the deepest depths of our soul is a journey into the self, where the self is itself its own universe.

I will not be able to define what it means to be human. It is only in my own attempts to understand myself, my own history, and my unique relationship to the world will I be able to see the potential of a human in me.