II. On the narcissistic quest of filling the void

The Other is my own reflection that creates me. I hold this gaze to my othered self: Nietzsche's abyss and Narcissus' obsession. Any attempt to reach out to my reflection creates a gap, which is a distance measured by infinities. Direct contact with the Other is an act of suicide, so I rely on reflections. The mirror allows me to be in contact with my othered self in my own appearance. This familiarity keeps me sane, this lie, this fiction, allowing me to come to terms with the truth: all my desires are meaningless and this meaninglessness only survives in projecting myself to it. I clothe this void with an appearance I'm familiar with and with a purpose that I can recognize so I can see myself through it. I do this to have a sense of comfort that somehow, I understand a little thing about the world. I do this only because it affirms my existence. I see the world through a piece of truth that I created and I see myself in the world by creating something that helps me understand it. I become the creator of mirrors, the slave of my reflections.